


Call The Clock

by saddle_tramp



Series: Gambling On Dreams [1]
Category: Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: Cheating, Episode Related, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-17
Updated: 2011-02-17
Packaged: 2017-10-15 17:55:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/163358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saddle_tramp/pseuds/saddle_tramp
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rating: PG-13<br/>Spoilers: Wagon Train parts 1 & 2</p><p>Summary: Yeah, I know, everyone and their sister has written fic based on Wagon Train, but this fits into my Gambling On A Dream 'verse as back story for the main trilogy in the 'verse: Against the Grain, Dealer's Choice, and Pony Up. I used dialogue from Wagon Train, but that's not the important part of this fic. What they don't say is where the meat of this story lies, as it so often does with Chris and Vin.</p><p>The title comes from the poker term 'call the clock', which is a method of keeping players from taking too long to play their hand. When someone calls the clock, the player has a set amount of time in which to make up his mind; if he fails to do so, he's out of the game. It seemed to me like it fit the story on several levels.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Call The Clock

 

Vin urged Peso a little faster, passing wagons and riders without really noticing them as he headed for the man in black at the head of the train. Chris had been avoiding him since they argued over Charlotte, and it was wearing hard on Vin that Chris would turn and go the other way whenever he saw Vin approaching. He had told Chris to stay out of it, yeah, but he hadn't realized Chris would take that to mean to stay away from him, too. He couldn't ride out with hard words still between them, and that wasn't easy to fix when Chris wouldn't even _speak_ to him. He figured running up on Chris right in front of God and everybody was just about his last chance to set things right between them.

Peso finally drew even with Pony and slowed to match Pony's pace without any cue from Vin. Chris glanced at them and then looked ahead again, and Vin tried hard to sound much calmer than he felt as he said, "Got out of there awful easy."

"Seemed that way," Chris replied.

Vin easily recognized the tone Chris used when talking with people he didn't trust enough to show them his true feelings, and he hated hearing that casual-sounding indifference directed towards him. "Chris, I'd like to set things straight."

"It's your life," Chris said without looking at him. "None of my business."

Vin managed not to flinch, but only just barely. He wanted to say that it was Chris' business most of all, but he couldn't. He took a slow breath to get control of himself before he spoke again. "Reckon you think I'm in the wrong here."

"What I think is you're already gone," Chris replied as he finally he looked at Vin, and his amused expression didn't match the look in his eyes. Anyone who didn't know Chris very well would've taken the amusement at face value, but Vin knew Chris' eyes only went grey and dark like that when he was hurting.

"I'm right here," Vin said softly.

"For how long?" Chris asked, still pretending not to feel anything one way or the other while his eyes gave away the lie, and Vin had to look away. "I need to know I can depend on you, Vin. Let me know when I can." He kicked Pony without giving Vin a chance to reply, galloping on ahead while Vin just stared after him.

A large part of Vin wanted to gallop after Chris and apologize, even tell the man how he felt about him, but another part of him had seen too much to let him take the chance. He wheeled Peso and kicked him into a gallop, heading back to check their backtrail even though he wasn't really seeing much of what he passed.

Vin knew what happened when a white man admitted having feelings for another man. He'd been younger than JD when he rode into a little town in west Texas where a man had been chained to a post and burned alive after another man accused him of trying to get in his britches, and the stink of burned meat and the sight of the charred corpse had hit Vin like a physical blow. He had decided right then that getting laid could never be worth that risk. He hadn't been with a white man since, or any man for that matter, except for when he rode with the Comanche right after the war.

Vin's feelings for Chris were a lot more complicated than wanting to get into his britches, but that was still a part of it and he was pretty sure that Chris didn't go for that kind of thing. Chris loved the ladies more than was likely good for him, to the point he had even dragged Vin into a whorehouse or two, sure that getting laid could cure whatever ills might be bothering Vin at the time. Vin had gone along with it to keep up the appearance of liking women, but that had been the only reason he set foot in either place. The idea of visiting a whorehouse just didn’t appeal to him. There wasn't much reason to visit one unless you wanted a whore, and he didn't. He liked looking at pretty ladies almost as much as the next man, and he enjoyed the way they smelled, but that was about it. When he had a hankering for someone to share his bed, ladies just did not come to mind.

Even Charlotte, who wanted him just like he was, didn't make his heart race the way it did when he caught sight of Chris after being away from him for a while. Being with a lady who needed him like Charlotte seemed to had been better than having no one at all, but it didn't take him long to realize that wasn't saying all that much. He'd shared his blankets with her, and he hadn't argued when she made it plain she wanted to do a lot more than sleep, but she hadn't expected much from him because that ass of a husband of hers wasn't worth the price of the bullet to shoot him with. She had thought it was sweet that Vin was 'shy', just like most ladies he'd been with, and hadn't minded that he knew damned little about pleasing a woman once their clothes came off, beyond the obvious.

Charlotte had told him what she liked and he had managed to go from there well enough that she had said after that she more than satisfied, but Vin had felt like that was more because of her low expectations than anything he had done. He definitely hadn't felt the same way, too nervous about making sure she was taken care of to really enjoy himself, but the way she had held on to him afterwards had been so nice that he had figured he could get used to it. It wasn't like he had a whole lot of other options, and it _had_ been nice to sleep with someone – anyone, really – who wanted him just as he was, rough edges and all. He hadn't been with anyone who gave a damn about him in a very long time, and it had felt really good to be held even though the one holding him hadn’t been the one man who had been in his thoughts and dreams the better part of two years.

Still, even though the holding after had been nice, he hadn’t been able to forget one important fact: sex with Charlotte just plain didn't mean as much to Vin as it was supposed to. He could think of worse ways to pass the time, but he could think up a lot of _better_ ways, too, and most of them would have hurt Charlotte right to the quick if she knew how she measured up. He'd never tell her that he would rather spend time shoeing a good horse than have sex with her, of course, but he couldn't help that it was how he felt, just like he couldn't help how he reacted to her wanting and needing him so bad. It was real nice to feel he was so important to her, but he was starting to realize that it wasn't enough.

She wasn't the one person Vin wanted like he wanted his next breath, and it wasn't fair to anyone involved to let her think she was.

 

~*~*~*~

 

Chris was riding back by Gerard's wagon talking to Billy when he saw Peso whirl to look up towards the top of the ridge. He tensed, sure the canny mustang had sensed something, and watched as Peso charged halfway up the slope before Vin leaped off, gun in hand and headed higher at a run. Vin had obviously seen or heard something that shouldn't be there, or he wouldn't have pulled his gun already, but he wasn't moving like he thought he might run into anything he couldn't handle.

All hell broke loose a moment later and Chris kicked Pony forward, cursing under his breath just as the ground exploded under Vin's feet, throwing him down the steep hill. Chris heard gunshots and then another explosion as he pulled Pony up near Vin's still form, but he didn't spare them much more than a glance as he leaped out of his saddle.

Vin started moving about the time Chris reached him, and Chris didn't even think about possible injuries as he dropped behind Vin and put his arms around Vin's chest just under his arms to help him up. "You alright?" Chris asked as he started carefully lifting Vin up into a sitting position, half afraid to ask but needing to know.

"Most of me," Vin said raggedly, dazed.

Chris could tell from his voice that Vin was feeling far from alright, but they were right out in the open and it was making him nervous as hell. If he took Vin at his word, even though he was pretty sure it was a lie, they had a decent chance of making it to the wagons. If there were more ambushers than the ones Buck and JD were taking care of they could easily get killed in the crossfire where they were, so it wasn't hard to make a choice. "Alright," Chris said, hauling Vin up a little straighter. "Come on."

Vin tried to help Chris get him moving while Nathan gave them cover as best he could, but Vin didn't make much progress until he was on his feet. He began recovering from the beating he had taken much faster once he was walking, and he was moving completely under his own steam by the time they reached the lead wagon. He still looked pretty shook up to Chris, but considering what he'd just gone through Chris was pleased to see him recovering so fast.

Nathan approached then, hefting Vin's sawed-off Winchester. "Vin."

Vin looked at him and then Nathan tossed Vin his gun, which Vin caught a bit awkwardly with his left hand, keeping the right arm close to his side.

"You sure you're all right?" Chris asked, trying not to let his concern show.

Vin holstered his gun, wincing as he moved his right arm, and then he said in a nearly normal tone, "Yeah, I feel better than I look."

Chris acted like he took that at face value and made himself turn away like he wasn't worried as hell by the way Vin was standing. Vin had ignored cracked ribs more than once like it was nothing, so he had to be in more pain than Chris wanted to think about if he was so obviously favoring his right side. "Alright," he said as he started walking, "let's go find Dickey O'Shea." He heard Vin and Nathan move to follow him towards their horses and made himself keep going.

The last thing he wanted to do was crowd Vin again. He'd tried that already and then Vin ran off with that woman, which might well have been the last Chris saw of him if Vin and Charlotte hadn't stumbled across O'Shea's men. If he said the wrong thing again he was pretty sure that would be his last chance.

He didn't think Vin would be coming back if he left again, and it was killing him that he didn't know how to stop him from wanting to go.

 

~*~*~*~

 

Vin didn't want to talk to anyone after they got the wagons back to the land the settlers had bought, so he found himself a way to help that kept him away from the people who were unpacking. He helped to get the wagon teams unhooked and into the rope corral he had strung up downstream by the river, and then he began pulling harnesses and checking the horses for sores with the few settlers who were the kind to care for their horses before themselves.

It was an easy job, something Vin could do without paying attention, and it didn't force him to use his right side any more than he'd have to when he was ready to ride out. He was pretty sure he had a couple busted ribs, but he'd felt of them and they were still in place, so he figured he wouldn't be poking out a lung or anything as long as he was careful. He knew from past experience that if he stopped moving too long his side would stiffen up like a slab of wood, and then it'd hurt like hell just to breathe. Moving hurt too, but he'd take pain he could control over the other option any day.

Vin was working on Gerard's mismatched team before long, the last one needing cared for, but he wasn't really paying attention. Chris hadn't spoken more than a couple of words to Vin since just after Vin got hurt, but he still couldn't stop thinking about it. Vin had been pretty dazed after he landed at the bottom of that hill and he was still half-convinced he had dreamed the way Chris' arms had wrapped around him and pulled him close.

Even hurting like hell it had felt pretty damned good to have Chris hold him and know Chris cared if he was alive or dead. Chris might not feel the way Vin wanted him to, but for the first time in months Vin thought maybe there was hope there that someday Chris' feelings would change. Chris had always let Vin get closer than he allowed anyone else, often leaning against Vin with an arm around him like it was the most natural thing in the world, and Vin couldn't help enjoying it every time.

Those hints of what Vin so desperately wanted from Chris had been enough to keep him going when times got rough, and he finally realized that even those scraps of affection from Chris meant more to him than Charlotte's love. As long as he could be so close to Chris, Vin didn't really want what Charlotte was offering him. It had been real nice to be held like he meant the world to her, but that paled to almost nothing when he compared it to how it had felt for Chris' arms to be around him. Charlotte made him feel needed, sure, but Chris owned his heart and soul. Having Chris' arms around him, even for just a few moments, had felt like coming home.

Vin noticed he was checking Gerard's dun mule for a second time and made himself stop, patting the patient mule's shoulder before he turned away. He walked quickly towards the picket line where he had left Peso tied, right behind Charlotte's wagon so he would have to talk to her again no matter how much he just wanted to ride out and try to forget her. He had some tall thinking to do before he spoke to her though, and not much time to do it in since Chris intended to ride out pretty soon.

Vin had loosened Peso's cinch when he tethered him, so he figured he could go get Peso ready to hit the trail again while he was thinking. He had no idea yet how he'd tell Charlotte that he had changed his mind, but he knew he had it to do. He couldn't walk away without at least telling her he was going, even though he couldn't really tell her why.

~*~*~*~

 

Charlotte saw Vin go to his horse and looked around to see if Will was watching, but he was still settled against the front wheel of the next wagon over, sound asleep just as she had left him. She bit her lip, looking at her husband for a long moment, and then she turned away and walked quickly to the back of her husband's wagon.

The wagon and most everything in it wasn't hers, of course, as Will so often reminded her. She hated it desperately, but she had known how he felt about a woman's role in life long before she married him so she really had no one to blame but herself. She had nothing of her own except a few dresses and two books she had hidden in the basket that held her clothes, and she knew Will would never allow her to have much more than that. Will said he loved her, but he treated her more like his property than his wife, and he didn't believe she needed anything of her own but clothes to wear while she took care of him.

She reached for the rope that held a milking bench on the back of the wagon a moment later, but she didn't really want to take it off and just played with the rope, watching Vin out of the corner of her eye.

Vin saw her, as she had known he would, and after a moment he left his black gelding and walked slowly over to her. He looked serious and unhappy, his beautiful smile nowhere to be seen, and she was speaking before she really even knew what she was going to say. "I thought I'd unpack for him, and then I'm ready to go."

"How's he feeling?" Vin asked quietly, and it bothered her that he seemed to have to force himself to look into her eyes. 

Charlotte smiled and tried to sound cheerful as she said, "Oh, he'll be up and around in no time." She reached out to touch Vin's hand as she added more softly, "And I'll be in Brazil."

Vin looked down and then away, and she was just starting to panic when he finally looked at her again. "I ain't goin' to Brazil."

"Vin, you don't have to do this," Charlotte said quickly, trying to hide how distressed she was. She felt like the ground was crumbling away beneath her feet, and knew her chance at finally being with a man who saw her as an equal was slipping away. "I'm ready to go. I— I swear."

Vin's gaze didn't waver as he said quietly, "I've changed my mind about us, Charlotte. I'm sorry."

Charlotte reached to cover his lips with her fingers, not wanting to hear any more. Vin closed his eyes a long moment and then kissed her fingertips as he reached for her hand to pull it down far enough he could speak, holding her fingers so gently it hurt her to think about it. "It's best this way," he whispered, and then he looked down again, unable to meet her eyes.

"No," she whispered as she felt the sting of impending tears, but Vin didn't seem to hear. He held her hand a moment longer, not looking at her, and then gave her hand a squeeze and turned away, letting go as he moved quickly back to his horse.

Charlotte turned away, unable to watch as she heard him untie his horse and turn the gelding towards her. She lifted her hand to press the back of it against her lips so she wouldn't make a sound as tears slid down her cheeks, determined not to let him hear her sob. He walked by without stopping and she turned again to put her back towards him as he left her, barely able to keep her silence as tears slid down her face.

Vin was everything she had ever wanted in a man, except the one thing she wanted most of all.

He didn't love her either.

 

~*~*~*~

 

Chris had acted like he didn't notice the conversation Vin had with Charlotte, but he saw it all from where he stood tightening Pony's cinch. He could tell what was said from Charlotte's reactions, and he hated himself a little when he realized that he was happy to see her in such pain. She didn't deserve it, he knew, but he was still glad that Vin had decided to end whatever it was between them. He had seen how Vin soaked up the affection Charlotte offered him and figured he had some idea how Vin felt about her, but he was too selfish to want her to have him.

Billy came running towards Chris just as Vin swung into Peso's saddle, distracting Chris from watching Vin. "Chris! Ma said I can ride with you! Can I? Can I, please?"

Chris couldn't help but grin at Billy's enthusiasm as he grabbed Billy under the arms and swung him up towards Pony's saddle. "You bet, Billy." He made sure Billy was settled and grinned. "There you go."

Billy beamed at him happily and scooted up as far as he could to let Chris swing into the saddle behind him, and a few moments later they were heading towards the river with the others.

Chris was glad when Vin moved to ride next to him, but Vin was entirely too silent and still. Chris let the silence stand for only a dozen strides before he asked quietly, "You alright, Vin?" He didn't say any more, mindful of Billy sitting in front of him and Ezra at Vin's other side pretending he wasn't listening to every word, but he had to ask. He wanted Vin to know he gave a damn about how he was feeling, even though he knew most of it was his fault.

Vin didn't look at Chris as he made an aborted move like he was going to shake his head, then he nodded slightly instead. "She belongs here," Vin said finally, and Chris felt a little pang of regret at how hard Vin was working not to let his feelings show. "It's the life she's always wanted."

Chris didn't know what to say to that, not with others around listening in, and he was glad when JD and Buck started in on that letter of JD's again, distracting everyone. He looked at Vin again, wondering if there was anything he could do to help Vin deal with walking away from Charlotte a little better.

Vin finally glanced at him then, and his blue eyes softened just a bit as he managed to give Chris a crooked little smile as if to say he'd survive.

Chris returned the smile and gave Vin a slight nod, and he was glad to see Vin's smile widen a bit as he looked towards the trail ahead of them again.

The others started laughing at Buck just as Chris grinned, following Vin's example and looking ahead at the trail. He didn't like that he had hurt Vin by forcing Vin into making a choice between him and Charlotte, or even that he had pushed Vin into hurting her, but he wouldn't change a thing about it even if he could.

Chris didn't understand it, and he had no idea what to do about it, but he needed Vin too much not to put up a fight when someone else tried to take him away.

 

~ End


End file.
